Offense
by variaty of flavours
Summary: Sawada Tsunayoshi had been reminded on a daily bases that Hibari Kyouya was not a man to offend...
1. Shower

**A/N:** I know what you are thinking. 'Why is this story so short? Is it really worth reading?' The worse it can do is waste 20 seconds of your life, so read at your own discretion.** -Vari**

Before you move on to reading, we (as in Vari and Yuki) would like to thank all the people who reviewed and favourited – apparently that's not a word - on our previous story "Gift of a lifetime." Thanks a bunch.

**Disclaimer**: Wow this is a first… but NO, I do not own KHR, not that I never wished to.

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Sawada Tsunayoshi had been reminded on a daily bases that Hibari Kyouya was not a man to offend, whether seriously or jokingly.

Just the other day…

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_"Tsunayoshi, hand me my phone."_

_"Please get it yourself, Kyouya."_

_"Did you decline my requisition? I see you grew some backbones."_

_"Well, excuse me! But rational people don't ask 'someone' such ludicrous things when the said 'someone' is taking a shower!"_

_"I had the notion that you would progress your way around that insignificant obstruction, would you not, Tsunayoshi? Perhaps I thought too highly of you."_

_"Get over yourself, lazy bum."_

_"Wrong move, Herbivore."_

_"Ah-h!"_

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He definitely did not appreciate the aching and the throbbing afterward, or his second shower that day.

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**A/N**: I know it is super short, and mind you my partner in crime actually refuses to post this without a backup story, but I just have to post it up. Inspirations are hard to come by these days…


	2. Hamster

**A/N:** Aha... Didn't think I would make this multi-chapter, but it is now. This is officially a drabble~ Don't worry, if it's bad, it will only waste 10 seconds of your life this time. **-Vari**

Cheers to everyone who reviewed for the first offense. Triple cheers to Yuuki who gave me the idea. Thank you!

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Sawada Tsunayoshi insisted on talking to an utterly irritated Hibari Kyouya about "important matters." Unable to comprehend the words spurring out of him, Hibari interrupted half way through his rant...

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"_What are you blabbing on about, Tsunayoshi?" _

"_I said I bought this chubby hamster yesterday in a pet store. It was so helplessly adorable and it reminded me of you."_

"…"

" _So I named him Kyouya! Isn't that a great name?"_

"…"

"_Eh, what's wrong Kyouya? I don't like that look in your ey-""_

"_How. Dare. You. Compare. Me. To. A. Hamster. "_

"_What are you talking about? I-"_

"_You insinuated that I am an herbivore. This is unacceptable. Prepare to be bitten to death."_

"_Ehh-h?!?! You're not letting me finish my senten-!"_

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All he wanted to do was brag about his new pet.


	3. Purple

**Author's note: Would you look at that? Two years have passed since the last chapter... I am so sorry to keep you all waiting. I present to you the third offense to save my butt. I apologize if it feels very abrupt, but the idea is too good to pass. Enjoy. -Vari**

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Hibari Kyouya was not pleased with what he saw when he awoke that particular morning. He instinctively strolled into the kitchen for an answer.

"_Good morning Kyouya! Did you have a nice rest?"_

"_Tsunayoshi. What. Is. This."_

"_You noticed? That gorgeous shade of purple matched your violet shirt and black suit so well! I took the liberty to have you look your best by applying it on for you!"_

"_Shut up, Herbivore."_

"_Calm down, Kyouya. No need to get violent. It's only nail polish. I frankly think you look exotic in that hue." _

"_I appreciate the compliment. Any last words?"_

"_Let's talk this over in a civilized manner."_

"_Of course, with my tonfa. Before that, do enlighten me, Tsunayoshi. How did you do it?"_

"_Promise me you won't get mad? All it took was a shot of brandy to knock you out cold- "_

A loud collision ensued, followed by silence.

"_That explains the throbbing pain in my head."_

Hibari Kyouya exited the kitchen to find aspirin and acetone, leaving Sawada Tsunayoshi's comatose body engraved in the cracking wall. That was the last time Sawada Tsunayoshi painted his nails without consent, at least in purple.


End file.
